The previous two weeks….

The beautiful flower finally

Now can be withered

Or can be gay

The poison bee has gone away

Vanished in the air

The beautiful flower finally

Dare to say what’s inside

Because the night has come

To get the lavish outcome

And the morning breeze

Ends it all, thru the line

Break all the knots

That is fragile after all

And I know that he doesn’t even care at all….

Vale.

Story one: MY BELLES-LETTRES

‘I’m writing my belles-lettres but you are occupying with numbers and figures…’

That day was like the other ordinary day for her. Her plans have been arranged systematically in her schedule notepad because she’s afraid of missing doing things that she should’ve done for that day. Most of the students done that because their brains still haven’t achieve the ability like the computer can do. They keep missing things. They have short term memory which merely can store a few things in their mind in a particular short period. Most of them only rely on their short term memory which consequently ended up with incomplete things that they need to accomplish for that day. So at the end of the day, they have to delay it for the next day. The idea of jotting down all the things that students need to do in a notepad is kind of passé among students nowadays. This is due to most of the students already possessed a very advance technology device for instance Smartphone, iPads and so forth. So they prefer to use those as their second memory which is very reliable. But not to her, she still uses the outmoded way which is relying on her notepad. So after finished her class that afternoon, she took a glance at her watch on her left wrist which showed 12.55pm. It still takes an hour to go fix her teeth that she always suffered the pain, her monologue said. Without taking lunch, she just sipped the strawberry milk in order to prevent her stomach from ringing while waiting outside the dental. This is her first time to have a check up with the dentist in this place so she really hopes the dentist will treat her nicely. Even though it still takes an hour for the dental to open, she decided to wait outside by sitting on the stools there. While taking the relaxed ambience amid the dell and a beautiful lake decorated with the lotus flowers, her mind suddenly came across with the picture of  the spectacular scenery in the The Notebook where Allie and Noah drifting in a boat surrounded by thousands of the pure white swans swimming and dancing in a wide lake full with the trees. The twilight scenery heightens their fascination about that place and their precious meeting after years of being apart from each other. She was already overwhelmed by the atmosphere and a beautiful moment they have there, her monologue said again. After the pictures of the spectacular sceneries have diminished thru her blinking eyes, she starts feeling bored. She’s flicking thru her phonetics notes that she just learnt. She needs to practice the sound for each phoneme because the PISA is just around the corner. She has to put all her wits and effort to excel and memorize it. It might look just a piece of cake but huh! She can’t say more! Then, after a few minutes sitting there, there comes a lad in black, wearing glasses looking outside the dental. She told him that it will be opened at 2pm as usual. There is a time schedule pasted on the dental door. So he joins her waiting outside the door and he…

 She should take a distance from him at the beginning….but she….

"Distance"

The sun is filling up the room
And I can hear you dreaming
Do you feel the way I do right now?
I wish we would just give up
Cause the best part is falling
Call it anything but love

And I will make sure to keep my distance
Say "I love you" when you're not listening
How long can we keep this up, up, up?

And please don't stand so close to me
I'm having trouble breathing
I'm afraid of what you'll see right now
I give you everything I am
All my broken heart beats
Until I know you understand

And I will make sure to keep my distance
Say "I love you" when you're not listening
How long can we keep this up, up, up?

And I keep waiting
For you to take me
You keep waiting
To save what we have

So I'll make sure to keep my distance
Say "I love you" when you're not listening
How long can we keep this up, up, up?

Make sure to keep my distance
Say "I love you" when you're not listening
How long til we call this love, love, love? 

photos from the The Notebook (2004)

now i know where is my mistake started. its not because of that place. its because of my own self. someone said to me that i am easy person. easy to be accepted and easy to be torn apart. I'm not very certain about that but i always considered their pov. because maybe  they know better or that is merely their first impression on me.well, that's their stereotypes about me. knowing many people make me know more about myself. if its a negative opinion, then i should endeavor to change to be good and if its a positive ones, then i should say i still have to put an icing on it. right? even tho sometimes i attempt to run away from being too  tired because of some particular beings around me but i still need to face em. everyday mostly. i know its kind bummer when we have to accept the truth about someone that we care that s/he isn't someone that we expected em to be.

"why don't you let people see the good in you?"
reply: "because i don't have to live with people's expectation on me"
(quoted somewhere)

p/s : i think you should realize that you are not worthy for my concern anymore.even a bit. vale.
- A.I

4mins

The precious moments that you’re going through is meeting with someone who is precious in your heart, beautiful in your sight and sound mellifluously when you heard. The adrenaline which flowing inside you seems to burst out from your skin but you can still manage to keep it calm and cool. But people do not know what is exactly you feel; your feelings inside are cuddling with anxious and excitement because you’re going to meet someone you’ve been anticipated to meet, to meet eyes and to exchange the sweet and sincere smile. Even though it was just four minutes meeting which happened at that particular ambiance, everything that came out from the lips sounds so beautiful till you can’t get any things that have been told or been said. Everything gets so peachy and beautiful. But somehow, this meeting made my heart filled with sadness. Feeling hurt. like always. Vale.

-          You’re so beautiful. But that’s not the reason I love you.

-          A.I

Lost-lavender socks-test-dirty socks-boon companions-messages. 

Sometimes people need to keep a distance to what they like or fond of most because once they lost it, it will leave them in a great and deep sadness. They might end up being dolorous all day long. Sometimes even take years and years to erase it. People around us may not comprehend of the condition we are in just only known about what had happened to us. Because they are not in our shoes, they are just a pair of socks which never letting the flesh of our feet to touch the shoes. If the socks are in a lavender fragrance, they might be our good and patient listeners and willing to spend hours just to listen to our problems. And after that, they will be our great advisors, make ourselves in ease and calm and try to say something motivate. Our sublime socks will always say something that we want to hear. A softly mellifluous voice of our boon companions will always be our good melody to listen to. Like one of the nasheed songs from the great singer, Sami Yusuf entitles “Make Me Strong”.  Even though we are in a great pain due to someone or something that we fond left us, at the end of the day, we will submit and rely ourselves to the one and only, our Lord Allah, the Creator of the universe.  It is the most wondrous thing to see and get the attention and love from Him. And we should thank Him and the lavender socks profusely. 

 

Unlike the socks which are in the state of dirty and unclean, they will always criticize us. And we will be completely crushed by their criticism. If they are not your true friends, they will be reviled for the bad things that we have committed.  Why didn’t you take the precautions before doing something? Why didn’t you decide something good to your self? Everything that we’ve done will be questioned again and again. Our stress will get more serious due to our friends’ criticism. True friends are the one who assist you to forget and forgive, implore you to live your life to the fullest, try their best to give a sonorous phrase merely to please us, always stand on your side and ask Allah to ease our short journey in this world. The saying that relatively I know about friends and friendships is “A friend in need is a friend indeed”. S/he will always be there for us even how busy they are with their lives. They won’t leave you when you are in trouble; they even help you to solve it. Try to find as many as you can because you will be much grateful to have them around you.

 

And for you, take this reminder to yourself. No matter what people had done to you wrongly, please try to accept it as one of the test from Allah. I know that it is extremely hard to remove the feelings, but at some point, you have to stop. You have to let it go. Please change and change because I don’t want to see you in this kind of condition. You make you and yourself sad and disappointed with this sort of behavior. And just so you know, your life should not be like this. Be happy and live your life to the fullest.

 

Life is full of ups and downs. Speak the truth okay.

This is something that I just found,

The sky grew dark;

The clouds began to thunder;

The lightning began to flash;

It began to rain in torrents.

Paraphernalia:

A good friend for me is a pair of lavender socks. It gives you the relaxing lavender scent which can comfort you and can make you feel relax. 

a.i